Checking OUT emotional baggage | Self Love

Top - NastyGal 

Skirt - NastyGal 

Jacket - Bershka

 Shoes - Converse

 Bag - Skinnydip

 Belt - Gucci 

COMMANDMENT #1 THY MUST LOVE ONE'S SELF

Emotional baggage, well Skinnydip just get us millennials don't they. Well let's put it this way I would definitely need a bigger bag than this to carry mine round. At the start of the year I met my current boyfriend, the love of my life and the man I'm pretty certain I want to spend my future with. And with this new relationship, I have only now realised how much emotional baggage I have carried around with me for years. From past relationships, childhood traumas and general lack of self-love. I'm not going to bore you by going into all of these things, so no need to get your tiny violins out. But the main thing for me is this whole idea of self-love. This is something I am very very far away from achieving but it's something that I know I need to work on. It can actually be quite crippling, looking in the mirror everyday and hating what you see. I even go to the lengths of avoiding mirrors during the day at work because I just don't want to see what state my face is in - crazy I know. But this lack of self-love is causing a strain on my day to day life, so I need to begin my journey. 

I think being a 'blogger' and posting lots of selfies and things, people find it weird I think like this. Because surely if you take a photo of yourself you must be fine with how you look, but that's very far from the truth. Trust me, that photo is 1 of 100, analysed to scrutiny and edited to look mildly okay for me to post. Of course I get those occasional moments where I'm feeling myself and I'm just like whatever but those days come rarely. For example even the photos from this shoot, I came away like wow maybe I can be a proper blogger* and shoot outfit posts without always looking like a dumpling. 
[*There's defo no such thing as a 'proper' blogger but you know what I mean]. 

But being with my boyfriend who constantly tells me I'm beautiful and he's punching (LOL), is making me try and embrace this self-love thang. Whenever my Grandma or my mum call me beautiful, I respond by 'well you have to say that because I'm your flesh and blood'. But when my boyfriend says that I don't really have that to come back at him because well he chose me. 

Now I'm not saying it's time for me to swan around calling myself beautiful but I suppose it's time to start embracing myself and not putting myself down for literally every single thing. I'm 24 and I don't want to look back at my twenties in 10 years times and regret spending all of those years hating myself and missing out on experiences because of it. 

So here's to not giving as much as a f*ck, start listening to my boyfriend (only on this occasion) and start my self-love journey.